As women, I believe that we are way too hard on ourselves. Society expects us all to be wonder woman. Working, being perfect parents, having the perfect home, car, body. But are we spreading ourselves so thin that we create a sense of overwhelm. I know for a while I did. And it took me quite some time to work out why I was so exhausted and felt so alone even when I was surrounded by work colleges, family and friends.
It used to be the norm to stay home with the kids and be the home maker. I know I felt incredible pressure as a working mum by other mums who chose to stay at home. There was no way we could afford to not have my second income so working was not really a lifestyle choose, more of a necessity. I never judged others for the way they lived their life and the choices they made so felt horrible when I was frowned upon my other mums for not being there to read to the kids in the morning, not being available for lunch and brunch dates with the other mums. No canteen duty for me! I would get in trouble from the teacher for not being a homework nazi and reading with my child every night. And thank god we didn’t have the restrictions now in schools for lunch boxes that are the expectations today. But my kids had quality time with me. We could afford holidays together. Extra activities could be paid for and they have grown up into really lovely teenagers so I must have done something right.
I have learned over the years to learn to say no. I have taught the kids to be more independent and responsible. I have simplified life and reduced the drama. But most of all I have learned not to care about what others think. I have found a few gems of people who I can trust. Good people that I connect with that get me and are on the same page. I no longer care about society’s pressures. I only care about those I love and that they have support and love. I have reduced the need for stuff and replaced that with the need for experience, compassion, and authenticity. I am still a busy mum with multiple income streams but no longer put the added pressure on myself to be a super hero.